If only I was wolverine..

I would have jumpped off my building now.
Touch my exhaust pipe.

Sit on a bbq pit.

Sleep on CTE at 3am

I just feel like getting myself hurt...
Just so that I can feel the pain.. Even knives don't work anymore.. Cuts are just cuts.. I need to feel more pain..

Only by being him, I can suffer all the pain in the world, but still being alive.. Alive so that I can still have my chance... Feel the pain so that I can have physical pain instead of emotional.. cause it really hurts alot now..